Homework debate: Too much homework vs. Ban homework; No homework vs. Is homework beneficial?

What are parents and children to do solve the homework dilemma?

Homework has become one of the biggest issues for parents and kids. It brings with it anger, frustration, tears, fears and family disharmony. Jack, a nine year old, often spends all afternoon and evening doing homework, sometimes until eleven o’clock at night. In addition, he always needs help with it, so his mom and dad got him a homework helper from a tutoring service.

Dear Dr. Linda,

Our second grader loves school. But homework is another issue. He hates to do homework, sometimes to the point of throwing tantrums. We tell him that if he gets it done, he can play. But he never has time to play since it takes him hours because he wastes so much time.

We’re trying to teach him that he has to do his homework, but things just seem to be getting worse. B.L.

Most kids say they don’t like doing Homework.  But why?

For many kids, they’d rather be outdoors playing or watching TV or texting their friends. These are certainly understandable reasons.  Usually, when parents and teachers help them understand how important homework is to school success, they’ll buckle down and do it.

It helps if homework is always done at the same time each afternoon or evening, and there’s a regular, quiet place to do the work. In addition, kids need to have good study skills.

But what happens when homework is a struggle?

Dear Dr. Linda,

My daughter does her homework while she’s text messaging her friends, listening to music and chatting with her friends on Facebook. She argues that she can do her homework while doing all this. Is she right or should I make her do her homework at the kitchen table so I can watch her? Very Frustrated Mom.

Dear Frustrated Mom,

Teenagers value their social life and don’t always understand or agree with advice from Moms. Your daughter will argue that she is doing her homework, and she probably is. She doesn’t realize that she’s doing her homework like a robot but not learning anything from it.

But having her sit at the kitchen table will be torture for her and for you. You don’t need to watch her do her homework.

When you’re both calm and she’s listening, talk about the research that has been done on the teenage brain and multitasking. It doesn’t work. The teenagers who didn’t multitask while they doing homework or preparing for tests finished their work quicker and learned more. In fact there’s a lot of research that proves multitasking doesn’t work for anybody, not just teens.

However, listening to music if it isn’t too loud may help. Research shows that listening to music while studying helps some kids, especially kids with ADHD.

She’ll just have to experiment to see if music helps her concentrate.

Suggest to your daughter that she set up time to do her homework and set up another time to talk to her friends. This way she’ll have the best of both worlds. She’ll do better in school, and she’ll still have time to talk to her friends. Let her know that you think it’s important for her to have time to talk to her friends.

Best wishes for homework time for you and your daughter,
Dr. Linda

Be sure to leave your school success question for me in the comment section below. I publish readers questions and answers every Friday.

Is Homework a Hassle in Your Home? Use these Three Tools to Make It Easier.

Time Management. Be sure your child has enough time to do homework, and you have enough time to help if needed. To be sure, download this schedule template and fill it in with your family. You may want more than one. Maybe fill one in for each member of the family. By doing so, you may see that your kids’ days are completely booked up between school and after school activities. They have no down time to relax or play much less do homework.

“Jonah, Jonah,” I repeated. Jonah’s mom had dropped him off a few minutes early, and he had fallen asleep in the waiting room. I had a tough time waking him up. Jonah, like lots of kids today suffers from sleep deprivation. How about your kids?

Kids (and adults) who don’t get enough sleep can’t function properly. Sleep restores energy to the body, particularly to the brain and nervous system.
When your child doesn’t get enough sleep, she has trouble concentrating on her schoolwork and remembering what she’s learned, even controlling her temper. The amount of sleep people need varies.

It’s the third time this week he’s forgotten to bring his homework home. Then you looked in her closet and couldn’t get the door shut because of all the stuff she’s crammed in this tiny space. There’s no order whatsoever to the mess. It’s no wonder she can’t find anything!  What’s a Mom to do?

It’s not just ADHD kids who are disorganized? Kids who don’t have ADHD sometimes can’t remember to bring homework home either. Can’t remember to take the homework back to school when they did bring it home. It’s not intentional. He really means to get his homework done. He just forgets.

Maybe her school materials are poorly organized. Maybe he has poor time-management skills. With all the distractions bombarding kids today, it’s not surprising that they forget so much and are so unorganized.

Without some basic organizational strategies, kids do poorly in school and their grades plummet. Some kids end up cheating or lying–whatever it takes to survive school with a minimum of criticism and punishment. Disorganization and forgetfulness get in the way of success at school.

You can teach your child how to be more organized. Maybe you’ll even find some of these tips useful around your home.

Here’s a familiar story. He comes home with his math homework. It’s 8th grade algebra. He can’t do it. He’s trying really hard. You say, “Well let me take a look. Maybe I can explain it to you.”  One glance and your eyes glaze over. You can’t do it either.  You can’t figure out as much as he can.

And it’s always kind of embarrassing. After all, you’ve been there for language arts, for social studies, even the dreaded science project.

Homework has become one of the biggest issues for parents and kids. It brings with it anger, frustration, tears, fears and family disharmony. And it affects the success your child has in school.

Jack, a nine year old, often spends all afternoon and evening doing homework, sometimes until eleven o’clock at night. In addition, he always needs help with it, so his mom and dad got him a homework helper from a tutoring service.