When your child is struggling in school it is one of the most difficult and frustrating experiences for the parent and the child. How many times have I faced a child who tells me that she thinks she is stupid, or tells me how much she hates school, and/or hates her teacher(s).
Many of these children are defiant, act out in class, refuse to do class work and homework. They lie about tests and homework or anything related to school to either make themselves feel better or to get their parents off their backs.
By teenage years, they are attached to their cell phones, are texting, or whatever is the mode of operation at that point in time. They sit with earphones on and some become rude to their siblings and other relatives. Eventually, we lose many of these kids because they drop out of school or become involved in some aspect of antisocial behavior.
Then there are those children that do none of that. They work hard, some even too hard, and are respectful, but they still struggle to get the A or even a B. Yet, there are those that survive. They get through whatever it was that caused them to slip. How do these kids get over the hurdles and succeed and others don’t?
They were lucky to have adults in their lives to work with them. Together, the cause of the problem was diagnosed. And most importantly, their parents accepted their child for who he or she was. They supported this child and didn’t walk away and throw their arms up in disgust when the child started to slip. They stood by them. They were not adversaries, instead respected their child’s efforts to survive, no matter how small an effort it may be.
They understood that no one wants to fail; everyone wants the gold star, the A+, the 100%, and if their child sitting across the kitchen table didn’t seem to care, that child was hurting inside. Kids who are struggling in school usually don’t sit and say, “You know mom, you know dad, I’ve been trying to figure out why I’m failing. I have come up with many causes and have worked out my options. So, here’s what I think.”If a kid says that, you sit back, count your blessings and listen to what they think. They may just have figured out what the problem is and how to solve it. This can happen.